穿过指缝的阳光

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穿过指缝的阳光 (意)艾柯

The Ice Breaker一见如故

It was the perfect setting—a beautiful log house on forty acres of land. We had a solid marriage; we even had the loyal family dog. All that was missing was kids. We had tried for many years to have children, but it just never happened. So my husband, Al, and I applied to be foster parents. We decided we should start with an older child for a number of good reasons. Since we both worked, child care might be a problem. Corby, our springer spaniel —and our only ''child'' thus far might be a bit too energetic for a young child to handle. And frankly, we novices1 were a little nervous about taking on an infant. We sat back to wait the few months they thought it might take to get a school-age child—which was why we were floored when the agency called us within weeks, just before Christmas, and asked if we would take Kaleb, a two-and-a-half-year old boy, for a few months. It was an emergency, and he needed a home right away.

我们拥有的一切都很完美——一座占地40英亩的漂亮圆木房子，美满的婚姻，而且有一条忠心耿耿的狗。唯一的缺憾就是我们没有孩子。我们尝试了很多年，想拥有一个孩子，却都没能如愿。因此我和丈夫艾尔想领养孩子。基于各种原因，我们决定领养一个年龄大些的。不仅因为我们两人都工作，照顾孩子会成问题；而且我们目前唯一的“孩子”科尔比，一条斯伯林格斯班尼种犬——它的精力太旺盛了，小孩子根本控制不了它。坦率地说，我们从没养过孩子，一想到照看婴儿就有些紧张。领养机构让我们回去耐心等待，几个月后会有学龄儿童可领养。谁知刚过几个星期，也就是在圣诞节的前几周，他们就给我们打电话，问我们是否愿意先领养一个名叫卡莱布的两岁半的孩子，照看他几个月。这使我们措手不及，他们说那孩子急需有个能照顾他的人家。

This wasn't what we had discussed so rationally2 a few weeks before. There were so many difficulties— it was such short notice, we had made holiday plans and most of all, the boy was a toddler3! We went back and forth, and in the end, we just couldn't say no.

''It's only for a couple of months,'' my husband assured me. It would all work out, we told each other, but privately I was full of doubts.

The day was set for Kaleb to arrive. The car pulled up to our house and I saw Kaleb through the car window. The reality of the situation hit me and I felt my stomach tighten. What were we doing? This child we didn't know anything about was coming to live with us. Were we really ready to take this on? Glancing at my husband, I knew the same thoughts were going through his mind.

情况并不符合我们几周前经过一番理性的讨论后提出的要求。困难很多——通知得那么急，我们已经有了度假计划，最重要的是，那孩子才学会走路！我们在房间里踱来踱去，深思熟虑后还是接受了。

“只几个月嘛。”丈夫劝我说。我们互相安慰说不会有问题，但私下里我却满腹狐疑。

卡莱布来我们家的日子确定了。那天，一辆汽车停在我家门口，透过车窗，我看到了他。在现实面前，我觉得头一下子大了。我们做了些什么？这个孩子要和我们共处了，我们对他却一无所知！对他的到来，我们真的做好准备了吗？我看了一下丈夫，知道他心里也在犯嘀咕。

We went outside to greet our little guest. But before we could even reach the child, I heard a noise from behind me. Turning, I saw Corby tearing down4 the steps and heading straight for the little boy. In our hurry, we must not have closed the door completely. I gasped. Corby, in all her excitement, would frighten Kaleb— probably even knock him down. Oh no, I thought, what a way to start our first meeting! Kaleb will be so terrified he won't even want to go into the house with us. This whole thing's just not going to work out!

Corby reached Kaleb before either of us could grab her. She bounded up to the boy and immediately began licking his face in a frenzy of joy. In response, this darling little boy threw his arms around the dog's neck and turned toward us. His face alight with ecstasy5, he cried, ''Can this be my dog?''



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My eyes met my husband's and we stood there, smiling at each other. In that moment, our nervousness disappeared, and we knew everything would be just fine.

Kaleb came to stay those few months. Eight and a half years later, he is still with us. Yes, we adopted Kaleb. He became our son, and Corby... well, she couldn't have been happier. She turned out to be Kaleb's dog, after all.

我们出去迎接这位小客人。还没走到孩子面前，就听到背后传来一个声音。我转过身来，看见科尔比冲下台阶，直奔小男孩。一定是我们太匆忙，没关好门。我屏住了呼吸，科尔比这么激动，肯定会吓着卡莱布——甚至会把他撞翻在地。哦，不！我想。我们第一次见面怎么就这样啊！卡莱布肯定会很害怕，不愿跟我们一起进屋，整件事情就要化为泡影了。

在我们拦住科尔比之前，它已经冲到卡莱布面前了。它蹦跳着奔向他，开始欢喜地舔他的脸。同时，这个可爱的小男孩抱住狗的脖子，向我们转过头，欣喜若狂地叫起来：“这是给我的狗吗？”

我和丈夫站在那里，相互对望了一下，笑了。那刻，我们的紧张感跑到了九霄云外，心想，一切都会如愿的。

卡莱布原本只会和我们待几个月,但是八年半之后，他仍和我们生活在一起。是的，我们收养了卡莱布。他成了我们的儿子，还有科尔比……哦，它高兴极了，它最终成了卡莱布的狗。



Waiting for the Breeze等待微风

"No air conditioning? How can you sleep?" a friend asks, horrified. I've just revealed that my family has decided to shut the air conditioner off and trim our electric bill.

"Nobody opens a window, day or night," warns another friend, whose windows have been painted shut for a decade. "This is the 90s. It's not safe."

On this first night of our cost-cutting adventure, it's only 85 degrees. We're not going to suffer, but the three kids grumble anyway. They've grown up in 72-degree comfort, insulated from the world outside.

“不开空调？你们怎么睡得着啊？”一个朋友问道，显然有些惊异。我刚刚透露，我们全家决定关掉空调，以降低电费开支。 “不管是白天还是晚上，都没有人会开窗的。”另一个朋友提醒到，她家的窗户刷过漆后，关闭十多年了。“现在是90年代了，不安全。”

开始节电计划的第一天晚上，只有华氏85度的气温，尚没热到让人无法忍受，可三个孩子还是嘟囔起来，他们向来与外面酷热的世界相隔离，在华氏72度的舒适温度下长大。

"How do you open these windows?" my husband asks. Jiggling the metal tabs, he finally releases one. A potpourri1 of bug bodies decorates the sills. As we spring the windows one by one, the night noises howl outside—and in.

"It's too hot to sleep," my 13-year-old daughter moans.

"I'm about to die from this heat," her brother hollers down the hall. "just try it tonight," I tell them.

In truth I'm too tired to argue for long. I'm exhausted after attending Grandma' s estate auction. I toted home her oval tin bathtub and the chair I once stood on like a big shot behind the counter of her store.

“你怎么把这些窗户打开啊？”丈夫问道，他轻微地晃动着金属插销，终于让一扇窗松动了。各种各样的虫子的尸体装点着窗台。当我们把窗户一扇又一扇地弹开时，家里很快充斥了外面夜晚的喧嚣。 “睡不着，太热了。”13岁的女儿抱怨道。 “我简直快热死了。”她哥哥走下客厅，大发牢骚。 “今晚只是试试。”我告诉他们。

事实上，我太累了，根本不想多说。参加完奶奶的财产拍卖会，我已经疲惫不堪了。她那口椭圆的锡制浴缸，还有那把椅子——我曾踩在上面，有模有样地站在她商店里的柜台后面，现在都被我拉回了家。

My face is sweaty, but I lie quietly listening to the cricket choirs outside that remind me of



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childhood. The neighbor's dog howls. Probably a trespassing2 squirrel. It's been years since I've taken the time to really listen to the night.

I think about Grandma, who lived to 92 and still supervised Mom's gardening until just a few weeks before she died. And then, I'm back there at her house in the summer heat of my childhood. I move my pillow to the foot of Grandma's bed and angle my face toward the open window. I flip the pillow, hunting for the cooler side.

Grandma sees me thrashing3. "If you'll just watch for the breeze," she says, "you'll cool off and fall asleep."

我脸上汗水涔涔，可我还是静静地躺着，窗外蟋蟀们的鸣唱声越来越大，不禁让我回忆起了童年。邻居家的狗嚎叫起来了，也许是过来了一只乱窜的小松鼠。多年来，我都没有时间真正聆听夜的静籁了。

我想起了活到92岁的外婆，她一直照看着我妈妈的花园，直到去世前的几个星期。于是，我恍惚又回到了童年的炎炎夏日，我住在她的房子里。我把枕头移到外婆的床尾，转过脸来，面向开着的窗户，再把枕头翻过来，捕捉每一丝凉意。 外婆见我翻来覆去，说道：“如果你只是等待清风，很快就会凉爽下来并睡着的。”

She cranks up the Venetian blinds. I stare at the filmy white curtain, willing it to flutter. Lying still, waiting, I suddenly notice the life outside the window. The bug chorus shouts "A jooga! Ajooga!" Neighbors, porch-sitting late, speak in hazy4 words that soothe me.

"Keep watching for the breeze," Grandma says softly, and I "uhhuh" in reply. June bugs ping the screen. Three blocks away the Friso train rumbles across Roosevelt Avenue. I catch the scent of fresh grass chppings. Then I hear something I can't decode—perhaps a tree branch raking5 the asphalt shingles on the store roof next door.

她把百叶窗帘卷起来，我盯着白色窗帘的薄片，希望它能摆动起来。这样静静地躺着，等着，我忽然察觉到了窗外的世界。小

虫子们齐声唱着“啾嘎！啾嘎！”很晚了，邻居们还坐在门廊下聊天，隐隐约约的话语声使我平静下来。

“继续等待清风。”外婆轻声说道，我喏喏地应着。六月的虫子撞到纱窗上，发出咻咻的声音。三个街区开外，一列开往弗里索的火车正隆隆驶过罗斯福大道。我闻到了一阵清新的青草味，还听到了一些奇怪的声响——也许是隔壁小商店的沥青木瓦屋顶上，树枝轻轻掠过时发出的沙沙声。

Sleepy-eyed now, I focus on the curtain. It flutter...

"Mom, did you hear that?" my seven-year-old blurts, "I think it was an owl family." "Probably," I tell him, "Just keep listening..."

Without the droning air conditioner, the house is oddly peaceful, and the unfiltered night noises seem close enough to touch.

I hope I'm awake tonight when the first breeze sneaks in.

现在，我昏昏欲睡了，我盯着窗帘，它摆动起来了……

“妈妈，那个声音你听见了吗？”我七岁的儿子突然说道，“我想是猫头鹰一家。” “可能吧，”我告诉他，“只要继续听……”

没有空调沉闷的嗡嗡声，屋子格外的宁静，夜籁之音未经过滤，似乎近在咫尺，触手可及。 今晚，当第一缕清风悄悄潜入时，但愿我还未入眠。



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